Christian Family - 01
God in His infinite wisdom has made man the head of the home. He emphasized this in His Word beginning with the creation account of Adam and Eve and then throughout the New Testament. This does not mean that women are incapable of leading the home, or that they are inferior to men or less intelligent. In fact God has made several women successful ministry, from women pastors to even the founder of Zion Bible Institute. Instead God created it so that men have authority and responsibility as leaders. This means that when it comes to roles in the church women should not be the primary leaders. This is shown specifically because Adam was formed first, and that Eve was the one who was deceived, and yet Adam was the one responsible for her sin.
While studying the Bible one will find many female spiritual giants. These include Ruth, Queen Esther, Sarah, Deborah Ruth or many others, however either they were not called specifically into being a permanent leader for a male leader was planned for next or because they had forced themselves into power. Christ himself did not diminish the gifts of women in scripture; in fact Christ broke the oppression that was so prominent in a time when women were hardly treated better than slaves. Jesus healed women, ministered to their hearts, minds, and bodies, and surrounded himself with their nurturance. All this was a shock to a culture that did not even allow a woman to have rights. It is so however that Christ did not include women in his twelve disciples, his leaders, nor did he train them in leadership.
When we recount the creation of man in Genesis we can see further into God’s providential plan concerning headship. Firstly, the Creator chose to form Adam first, and then Eve out of his side, instead of two separate equal lumps of the earth. This is important because God brought Eve to Adam, not Adam to Eve, and that points to headship. Secondly, God chose to tell Adam about the forbidden fruit, and had entrusted him the responsibility of informing Eve as well, as the spiritual leader. Thirdly, God recognized the need for Adam to have a helpmeet, and that it was not good for him to be alone. However, God did not fulfill Adam’s need right away, instead He left him in the situation until Adam could realize his own need for a companion while he was naming the paired male and female animals. This act brings so much clarity to God’s intentions for the people He made in His image. God knew that Adam needed a specific helpmeet created for him, and that why he gave women specific roles that are to be used intelligibly. Proverbs acknowledges wise wives as having good business skills, as being nurturers, as having value and as women of integrity and wisdom.
The scriptures point to the husband’s headship. Having that authority comes with the responsibility of the protection of his wife. This means nurturing her, encouraging all the freedom required to grow to be the asset that had created uniquely for him.
Christian Family - 02
God instituted and ordained marriage. He wanted there to be healthy families and meaningful relationships. The Bible closely identifies the husband and the wife, and considers marriage “the grace of life”. However after sin entered the human race the roles became perverted. Satan has tried to destroy homes by having husbands view women as objects (sexual or otherwise), by compromising his leadership.
Worldly love is object oriented, like idolatry. Our love must be different. It needs to be sacrificial. The Bible commands husbands to love their wives, this also means serving her. All skewed views that the husband has on relationships falls away as he becomes more aware of the love that Christ has for us.
Self-sacrificing love means a daily dying to self. As the head of the home it is the husband’s responsibility to set the example of going the extra mile, out of his normal tasks and duties but to help out so that his wife is appreciated and his children learn responsibility. The role that a father has should pattern The Father’s love for us; but it is impossible without the holy spirit’s guidance.
Christian Family - 03
Christ sacrificed Himself in order to set us apart. He did this so that we would not have any spot, wrinkle or blemish. This means that we were sanctified by His blood, that our ownership changed when He purchased us, and that we would be associated with the church instead of the world. His word continues to restore us and progressively sanctifies us.
With Christ as the example of headship, the husbands are supposed to pattern Christ. Husbands that dedicate their lives to serving God naturally influence their children and family to do the same. If a husband takes the responsibility of setting up family devotions and prayer, it will be instilled in his children and in turn in his grandchildren as a legacy of his own commitment to Christ. This is how a father is the ‘sanctifier’ for his family.
A husband also ‘sanctifies’ his wife the same way that Christ sanctifies His bride the church. If a husband is giving his wife unconditional love he is nurturing her talents and virtues so that she can be a Proverbs 31 wife. This gives her freedom from frustration which is often the root of unfullfilment.
Christian Family - 04
Christ sacrificed for and sanctified his church. He is also the ultimate servant. He served his bride, the church, with healings and miracles and wonders. He showed us how to be humble servants, to “wash each other’s feet”. Even now Christ intercedes to Heaven for his bride, the church. Ultimately He gave up his own body for the sins of the world in the highest act of servant worship.
In the same way that Christ turned us from the world to being the church, husbands are also “ecclesiating” their wives. Wives are “called out” from other Christian women. He is servicing her, signifying her, and nourishing her.
Paul commands husbands to love their wives the way they would love their own bodies, as they are one flesh. He serves her by praying with her, by encouraging her, by ministering to her needs. A godly husband will allow his wife time to develop herself and have her own quiet time or devotions. This is a picture of how God our Father and Provider supplies all of our needs according to His riches in glory in Christ Jesus.
Christian Family - 05
The bond between a husband and wife should be an unbreakable covenant. This bond reflects the faithfulness of Christ. When we sin He is always faithful and just to forgive us. Forgiveness and repentance is so much a part of the whole covenant. We are secure in salvation and we cannot lose it except by our own free will. A spouse should always be confident in their marriage without questioning dedication, for better or worse. This is the choice that they have made at their ceremony.
God’s forgiveness is depicted in the story of Hosea. Even though his wife left him for adultery and prostitution Hosea never stopped loving his wife. He searched for her and bought her back at an auction. In the same way God continually pours out restoration and forgiveness.
The word of God indicates in Genesis 2:24 that a man must leave his family and cleave to his wife. Cleaving is not the same is welding, because welding is two similar elements. Cleaving is like a “gluing together” of two different things without losing the make up of the original objects.
Christian Family - 06
The society today is not much different from new testament times. People were and still are morally depraved and sexually degenerate. It was more than acceptable to have prostitutes for pleasure, concubines to live with, and wives for procreating (Demosthenes). Orgies, homosexuality, sexually abused children was common. Perversion was acceptable. Divorce was as easy to attain as pirated music is today. For any reason a man could leave his wife, and women had no options.
Even in today’s “modern” and more “highly evolved” society things haven’t changed much. Especially in the church. Where the divorce rate in churches was 1 in 500 marriages, today’s current generation closely rival’s secular society.
When Paul calls women to submit to their husbands, it is often misunderstood. This kind of submission is not the same kind of submission that slaves and children fall under (hupakouo). A wife’s submission should be voluntary, as she is deciding to relinquish her rights “in honor preferring one another...” If a christian women is married to a non christian she must submit in all manners as unto the Lord. This means that in spiritual matters she is to follow the commands of the Lord.
Husbands and wives need to have mutual possessiveness and mutual submissiveness. This is mutual fulfillment in marriage, and it is only through the Holy Spirit.
Christian Family - 07
Many women today are trying to find new interpretations of Biblical passages that say that we are all equal in Christ the way that slaves are equal because we no longer have slaves. They say that all distinctions were superseded by their union in Christ. They must be careful in capturing the context as crucial. They must distinguish between position and function. This command was not bound in culture. Headship was founded in the bible as an institution and slavery was not.
God has commanded the wife to reverence her husband in all situations. Having reverence is really like having a healthy fear based on respect and affection. This reverence or fear is something that protects the relationship. This fear prevents from harm or danger. Reverence is also built on respect, practically meaning that wives can honor his decisions made.
This command from God is not based on the marital situation. Whether or not the wife has a christian husband or not she is still commanded to reverence him. When wives were brought out of sinful lifestyles in new testament times they often had to return to homes were promiscuity and pagan practices were still observed. No matter the toll on the wife Peter still outlined that a wife’s response must be reverence. Her duty of love is not selfishly on her own happiness but is an attitude that reflects God’s irrevocable love. This is her “silent witness”.
The graces of a woman comes from her fellowship with her Creator. Her godly spirit shows that she has died to herself and her fleshly emotions and has chosen to have the mind of Christ.
Christian Family - 08
Man’s sin nature is imbedded into everyone, including children. It is imperative that Christian parents realize their responsibility to train these little sinners into morally upright Christ followers. Mothers and fathers teach best by example. If the heart of the parent is fully anchored on God and if they parent understands and receives Godly discipline he will be able to show his children how to live. When we deal with out own faults and spiritual downfalls, they are less likely to reappear in our children. If we don’t address these matters then they are often even more exaggerated in the child as he grows older.
Parents must protect their children from bad manners, ungodly values, detrimental attitudes, and negative influences. When children understand that their parent’s relationship with God is authentic, then they have a healthy view of spiritual matters, and don’t view spirituality as a prison of rules, but as freedom in Christ.
Prior to the fall, man was naturally drawn to God and to worshipping the Creator. After the fall man reversed his worship to himself and idolatry. He is now inclined against worshiping God. The only thing that can overcome this concept is the unconditional love of Christ and the work of the holy spirit.
Parents are the first line of authority and didacticism in training up their childrenThe church must reinforce the values that are taught in the home, as a secondary teacher.
Christian Family - 09
Families should have very well defined spiritual goals for their children. They should set internal spiritual goals such as that their children understand prayer. They also need to set practical ways to live out their faith like having their children active in a local church ministry. Children also need to be encouraged to have a passion for the great commission, so that they can be a witness to others. These goals can be accomplished by parents with the help of the Holy Spirit, with prayer and by pursuing three spiritual goals of their own.
The first steph is to set an example to their children. It is imperative that parents are filled by the holy spirit, otherwise they would be striving by their own strength. That will produce great children but not Godly children. It is not hard to show ones kids the value of reading the bible, of prayer, and of attending church and of worshipping God if the parent has no hesitation to doing those things himself.
The second step is through formal instruction. Teaching your children Biblical principals yourself is of utmost importance. It is commanded in Deuteronomy. The parent must do this diligently and with patience and planning.
The third and final step is through informal instruction. The Bible calls us to be ready in season and out of season. It is imperative for the parent to find biblical lessons from everyday experiences in order to practically teach their children. This should be so easy because God’s work and involvement is apparent everywhere.
Christian Family - 10
Our world today is entirely perverse and completely depraved. It has always been and it always will be. God has commanded us to be separate from the darkness of the world. He shows us this best through his protection and sanctification of Israel. He chose to raise up a holy nation to be separate from the corrupt world system.
Parents must set a Godly example in a world that is fully turned away from the Creator. This society is perverse in every manner. They can take away prayer and the Bible from schools but encourage diabolical literature. Higher education emphasizes immoral concepts. All Biblical ideas are being tossed out with the trash. This includes all authority, punishment, free religion, and even nationalism.
The devil is cunning and sly. We must watch closely for corrupt attitudes that could escalate into devastation. One should not spoil his child, not teach him the Bible, remove him from all personal responsibility and fight around him, and see what happens. These little habits can corrupt the whole of a man.
Nothing can stand up to the word and the truth of God’s word actively working in a Christian parent. This parent disciplines appropriately, regularly reads his or her Bible, and exercise the fruits of the spirit. Moms and dads are always speaking with their actions that what they do is right, and what they say is okay.
Conclusion
The deep and thorough research that has gone into preparing these sermons has taught me so much more than stories or experience ever could have. I have a new appreciation for the Bible because I can see clearly how it is applicable to every day life. I now understand the infinite connections in the gigantic web of God’s plan.
Concepts that I always had questions about are now made self explanatory when compared to the examples that the Scriptures lay out. I understand the trinity and unity in headship so much better. I understand the importance of discipline and reproof and reverence because I can see how God uses these things to protect and promote me in His kingdom for His work.
The concept of the “first shall be last” is patterned all over scripture, but definitely in headship. When a leader has God-given authority he must serve the people he is over, whether it be his wife, family, church, or other institutions. In this way he is like Christ to his bride the church.
The command to “leave and cleave” is so much clearer now that I understand what cleaving really entails. I feel protected and love by God that he had planned this for my life, that He had instituted a concept that would enhance my abilities in Him and instill unity and protect me from harmful decisions.
Most importantly I understand that developing my walk with God and pursuing his righteousness consistently holds long term benefits for my marriage, family, and ultimately the world as a whole
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